Can You “See” What Others Miss With Women?

Do you know what separates the super successful from those who just get by? It’s simple, really: the super successful, whether it’s with money, business, or women, can “see” opportunity that the ordinary guy over looks.

Let me give you an example. In the mail order business, most ordinary marketers rent a mailing list, mail to it, and consider it a failure if they don’t make a profit. The super successful know that the real money is made in future sales to customers, so they can afford to lose a lot of money on a mailing as long as it produces customers. The best of the best engineer it so they can spend tremendous sums to acquire a customer so they can expand their business to thousands of mailing lists.

Obviously what each guy “sees” in the results of a mailing determine their success—one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

I’ll give you another example, this time in residential real estate investing. A seller has a house worth $200,000.00 and he owes $200,000.00 on it, $150,000.00 on first mortgage and $50,000 on a second, and has a judgement for $10,000.00 against him. He’s three payments behind and the bank is about to foreclose. To the average real estate investor and realtor, there’s no deal there. But the extraordinary real estate investor sees opportunity.

He or she knows that they can easily get the lien released, discount the second mortgage, and get the bank to agree to a “short sale,” the upshot of which he may be able to get a $200,000.00 house for $100,000.00 and put a fat check in his pocket. Why? Because he or she sees opportunity where the ordinary miss it.

Nowhere does this hold more true than when it comes to attracting truly desirable women. Most guys when they see a woman who is truly a stunner make all kinds of assumptions: they think she has a boyfriend, they think she’s “out of their league,” they think she shoots down better men than them all the time, etc., etc.

But the man who is truly successful with women “sees” opportunity. He realizes there is a very good chance she spends a lot of lonely nights at home because most men are intimidated by her. He realizes that she’s probably approached by a lot of goofballs every day, and that when he approaches her with a naughty boy smile backed up by personal authority, he will be incredibly attractive to her purely based on the contrast with all the waldos she has to put up with.

He realizes she just wants to feel attraction with a bright, fun, naughty, intelligent guy, and that if he can make her feel that magic feeling of attraction, that his looks, age, or income just don’t matter.

And he’ll welcome a great woman into his life because he was able to “see” where the average man was blind.

Are You About to Cross the DEW Line in Dating?

Back in the bad old days of the Cold War a string of radar stations was established to give the US early warning of a Soviet nuclear attack. It was called the DEW line, and DEW stood for Distant Early Warning. I imagine it still exists in some form or fashion today, but I don’t know what utility it really served—from what I remember it would give about 30 minutes notice, enough to put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.

Did you know a system like this actually exists for detecting psychopathic women? It does, and this one is actually useful—when it goes off there is action you can take to avoid the equivalent of a nuclear holocaust in your dating life.

As you talk to more and more women, you will begin to notice similarities between them. Many are bright and cheery, others fun and adventurous, some sweet and alluring, and others just plain dangerous.

You obviously, want to avoid the dangerous ones—and they do exist. They can make your life miserable no matter how skilled you are at creating attraction. While I hear many stories from men who got dumped because they did everything wrong and turned into a wuss, I also hear stories from men who did everything right and still had a nightmare of a relationship. Why? Because they weren’t looking for Distant Early Warning signs, signs that almost always indicate disaster is on the horizon.

Whenever I go to the gym, I always pay attention to how different women act around others in that environment. The serious ones go there to work out, give a friendly hello, and leave. Some go there for social hour and hang out with their friends. But some go there looking for trouble.

Here’s an example, and this applies everywhere, not just in a gym environment. There’s a woman in her early 40’s who works out at the same time I do. She’s in great shape, and has a great body. But she gives off DEW signs like nobody’s business.

First off, she’s always tan in the winter. Secondly, she always wears cloths that show just a little too much cleavage, a little too much thigh—and they’re always new and perfectly color coordinated. Her navel is pierced—recently.

She spends a lot of time not only chatting and flirting with the men in there, but is also very touchy-feely—obviously, and exaggeratedly so. She brings up the subject of sex on her own, trying to create a “come chase me, boys” environment.

She also drives a brand new, white BMW five-series, an obviously expensive car.

All of these things together paint a picture of someone you want to stay away from. Why? Because she’s trying to get everyone to “look at me” based on her looks and possessions. This is not a trait of a successful person with high self esteem. It is a trait of someone with a low self image who’s looking to compensate, looking for someone to rescue her.

Sure enough today, she brought a guy with her to the gym to “show off” to all the other men she flirts with, and all the women who give her mean looks. She was blatantly huggy and kissy with him, and he looked to be the classic “mimbo.” Now he could be a decent guy, just out for a fling—I have no idea. He seemed disinterested in the whole thing, although he no problem being “shown off.” He’s also got a ticking time bomb on his hands (if he himself isn’t one) because he’s been brought in to get everyone else to look at her and be jealous.

I have seen this behavior with many people (not just women), and it never ends well. I actively avoid people with these DEW signs, and when I detect them I get them out of my life before they have a chance to do any damage. Successful people don’t behave in this manner, because they don’t care about showing off, nor what people think about them. They care about learning and improving their lives, and showing off is not consistent with those goals.

So, when you first meet a woman, be sure to turn your “radar” on, and look for signs that she’s crossing the DEW line. If she does, run like hell, else you’ll enter it.

The Truth About Women And Words In Dating And It’s NOT About “Dating

The Truth About Women And Words In Dating

Have you ever had the experience of a woman telling you something, you taking it at face value, only to discover that she meant something else? Pretty frustrating, huh?

Why do women do this, why do they want men to “figure them out” instead of just telling them something straight up? To us, telling someone something straight up makes perfect sense—it’s how we interact with our guy friends.

But women communicate differently, and the same words spoken by a woman can have way different meanings and outcomes than words spoken by a man.

See, women make decisions based on internal feelings in the moment, whereas men tend to take a more literal view of things. Since women use internal feelings as a primary decision making process, they are sensitive to others feelings as well—and will often say something that is designed more not to disturb the other person’s feelings than to express an action she’s about to take.

Men just pretty much say what’s on their mind, and expect others to do the same. That’s why taking what a woman says at face value, like we would do for a guy can be so frustrating. But, if you understand the process that’s going on, it can actually be very enlightening.

Here’s what to do: when she says something to you that has an emotional connotation (do you like me, am I fat, you don’t understand me, etc., etc.,) don’t respond on a logical level. Respond in a way that creates the emotional state she wants you to put her in—attraction, uncertainty, and responding to authority.

All she’s asking you to do is change her emotional state to something she would prefer to feel. Sometimes that involves listening, sometimes a naughty comment, sometimes something that makes her laugh, and sometimes a demonstration of authority.

How do you know when to do what? By paying close attention to how she reacts to what you say to what she says. As you go through time, you’ll build a pretty complete cause-and-effect map of what to say and do when she says something. What you’ll discover is, most things she says fall into three or four categories, and so you only have to know one way to deal with each one.

What this does is, allows you to anticipate her behavior, something women crave in a man. Ever heard, “he always knows what I’m thinking?” This is usually said in a dreamy sort of way, because women love a man who knows what she’s thinking, but they can rarely find one.

So, if you master this skill (and it’s really easy to do), you’ll be known as that rare guy who “knows women.”

It’s NOT About “Dating”…

Want to know a sure-fire way to fail with women? Ask one on a “date”—you’ll be done before you start. How do I know? Because I tested it over and over and over, and every time I went on a traditional “date,” I never saw her again.

Why does this happen? The answer is simple: every guy asks a woman on a date, and if she goes on one with you, you’re just another guy (a JAG). Women don’t want JAG’s—they want a guy who’s different, a guy who creates attraction. Dating is also a very structured, uncomfortable ritual—you dress nicely, bring her flowers, go eat at a swanky restaurant, all the while wondering if you’re going to “get some.” Then at the end of the night, you wonder if you’re going to “get a kiss.” After it’s over you call your friends, and she calls hers to evaluate the whole ordeal.

No wonder dating sucks—it’s no fun at all, and it’s set up to fail from the beginning. So, I just don’t date. I “allow” a woman to spend time with me to see how much we can enjoy each other’s company over coffee. If she asks me “is this a date?” I say, “oh no, I don’t date. This isn’t dating, this is discovery. I get to discover if I like you or not!” They always love that response because it lets them know immediately I’m different from any other guy they ever met, and the experience they have with me will be vastly different than anything they’ve ever done before. And then they start to pursue me.